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My First Visit to a Jail

The Unattractive Booth

A Mother’s Perspective Part 2

I did everything I could as a mom, but the very thing that I was trying to avoid happened to my oldest son anyway. Dunstan was shot in the back of the head as a result of one bad decision to rob someone on April 1, 2017. He was shot by the homeowner. For so many years, I taught him the importance of being mindful and learning to make the right decisions.

Fast forward two years later, Dunstan is now serving an 18-month sentence for the home invasion that could have easily been a 30-year sentence. I’m so thankful for God’s Mercy and Grace.

It’s difficult visiting him behind bars. When visitors enter the facility, we all have to check in with security, provide proper identification, and go through a metal detector. Once that process is finished, we would, then, walk into a fairly large room, and wait for our loved ones to come out. I didn’t know what to expect on my first visit as I had never been to a jail, prior to that moment, so, I was pretty anxious. But thankfully, I got through the first visit, and of course, had to choke back the tears when I saw him for the first time behind the glass window.

No one should ever have to go through seeing their child behind bars. Dunstan has to wear a grey jump suit. And often times, I see his hair uncombed which saddens me, but I keep my emotions inside to ease the pain. Through it all, Dunstan still smiles each time I see him, but I know he goes through serious turmoil in my absence. Dunstan plans to share his story when he’s released, and hopes to encourage others, preventing them from making the same mistakes he did.

I recall a particular day when I visited him. We talked for about 45 minutes (oh, you speak with your loved one via a phone, and there’s a glass in-between) and he shared, with me, how difficult it gets just sitting in the cell, all day, especially when the facility is on lockdown. He told me all he does is, simply, sit still, although, he reads from time to time. I, often, encourage him to make the best out of the situation, and time will go by quickly. One good news is; he’s finally finishing up his last year of high school. Sometimes I ask myself, “would he have been this close to finishing if he wasn’t in jail?”

One thing that I do know for sure, and I’m thankful for, is that Dunstan is spending time, giving serious thoughts to what his life is about, and what direction he intends to take upon release. He assures the family and me that he has so many positive plans when he’s released. I look forward to that very special day.

I believe that this entire ordeal has made him stronger, and that, he needed this situation to happen, so that we could both reach our full purpose and potential in life. I truly believe that “The Listen Up Conversation” will impact many lives.

Just as the seasons change, I do believe now is the season for my son and I to make a difference in the community. I have great expectations for the upcoming season!

Peace & Blessings,


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